Gaybonics

Are you a little strapped for cash? Do you want to find a great payday loans program to help pay for the things you want but can't afford
right now? Need to look into reliable ways to get a cash advance or payday loan . Then go with Nationwide Cash? Make paying your
bills easy with a payday loan from Nationwide Cash. Get the money you need fast and easy at Nationwide Cash! Visit today!

• Gurl, "I got to get my nails did!" [Click for vocal] (and my weave tightened).
• "And you're telling me this because?"
• I can't even think str8.
• 4 out of 5 cats prefer lesbians.
• What-Ev.
• As if.
• Puh-leeze.
• I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is.
• Not straight, "gayly forward".
• " Talk to the hand cuz the air don't give a damn!"
• Fee-uss (as in that person/thing is “fierce” but it is pronounce with two syllables, not one).
• “Save the drama for your momma” – this should roll off the tongue almost like a song and is
  self-explanatory for the whiny fag.
• Don’t do a Glenn Close – Which means don’t approach someone who dissed you and ask
  what the haps are.
• I don’t like to repeat gossip – so I’ll only tell you once! – Similar to “If you don’t have
  anything nice to say, come sit by me.”
• You bustastop! – You’re being ridiculous.
• I exist, therefore I'm single.

Internet Gay Definitions:

After-hours -- where you go when the bars are closed and  you still haven't found someone to sleep with.

Baggage -- the excuse people use to punish their current boyfriends for things that their past boyfriends have done to them.

BiCurious -- gay

Bisexual -- gay

Bitter -- what all gay men are destined to become. Caused by drama and stress (see below).

Bottom -- orientation preferred by 95% of the gay population

Butch  -- what gay men who don't think they act gay call themselves. Actual butch men will never need to use this term.

Cuddle -- sexual activity in which there is no exchange of bodily fluid.

Drama -- an imaginary condition made up by sad, lonely individuals with no real problems in their life who feel the need
to drag stable, well-balanced individuals who are trying to make a
valuable contribution to society down to their level in hopes of making themselves feel better.
Ex -- 1) anyone you've slept with more than once.
      2) a club drug  popular in the late 90's.

Excedrin -- what every gay man should have in his medicine cabinet

Foam -- not sure anymore, as we haven't seen it in over a year.

Gaylights -- an unnatural highlighting of the hair that no straight man would be caught dead with.

Gurl -- the first word of every sentence. "Gurl, you 'bout ready to go?" or "Gurl, I haven't had sex in 3 days!"

Gym Bunny -- a troll who has realized that his only chance of getting laid is to work out every day.

Hayyy -- a greeting. The gayer you are, the more Y's you put at the end.

Homewrecker -- the person who stole your ex

Omaha Diet -- unnatural weight loss caused by nonprescription medications. Also known as Jenny Crank.

One Night Stand -- a very short-term relationship, the end of  which is signified by someone putting on their pants.

Philson Sex -- sexual activity in which everybody wants to get off, but nobody does. Enables you to have a one night stand
without actually becoming classified as a whore, yet still significantly more intensive than cuddling.

Rough Trade -- a one night stand that you will later pretend never happened.

Shot -- when you need to get drunker faster

Stress -- a non-imaginary condition brought on by the drama of  others

Top -- see Bottom

Trade -- what you bring home from the bar, paid for in services rendered.

Troll - anyone older than you that wants you to go home with  them.

Trick -- See Trade

Twelve -- how old you are if you're not 21

Universe -- the area of space contained within a three-foot diameter of every gay man.

Versatile -- glorified Bottom (but will top if absolutely  necessary)

Whore -- anyone who has more sex than you.

My Gaybonics Definitions

• Top -- Preferring the aggressive position during intercourse.
• Bottom -- Preferring the passive position during intercourse.
• Versatile -- Bottom
• Fag Hag -- Straight, usually bombastic, woman who hangs out gay guys and think she's the one that can change them all back.
• Dyke Daddy -- Straight or gay guy who hangs around of lesbians so that he get things fixed around the house.
• Woof -- What bears say to each other when they approve.
• Woofy -- What the type of bear you say "woof" to is.
• Bear -- See my bear page.
• Daddy -- Someone who uses a boy.
• Sugar Daddy -- Someone who picks up the tab and tells his significant other to shut up.
• Virgin -- This word is no longer in use.
• Cherry -- Anal sex for the first time.  You guess the rest.
• Diva -- Woman or admirer of woman fan.
• Cub -- Youngish bear, sometimes having fewer bear characteristics, but the potential to become full blown with age.
• Facial hair -- Goatee, 'Stache or Beard
• Stache -- Mustache
• Otter -- Thin Bear
• Behr -- Smooth Bear
• Smooth -- Not Hairy
• Boy -- Someone who needs a Daddy.
• Slave -- Usually someone with a doctorate degree who likes to be led around and humiliated.  Don't ask me why.
• Six Pack/Abs -- Abdominal Muscles
• Chelsea Boy -- Usually a twink, sometimes with muscles.  Shaves his body of its masculinity, especially the face. 
  Always with attitude.  Usually a white t-shirt, 501's, goes to the gym 100 times a week and -.05% body fat.
• Water Sports -- Not water skiing and surfboarding.
• Scat -- Not what Ella Fitzgerald sang.
• Monogamy -- A movie Diana Ross was in.
• Collar -- Indicates that one is a slave.
• Master -- Does NOT have to be someone who is butch.
• Twink -- Think Brad Pitt and (eesh) Tom Cruise.  If these are real men to you, then you like twinks.

[American Slanguages]

Gaybonics Test -- Name These Quotes:

• Clang Clang Clang went the ......?
• Jungle Red -- [The Women]
• Because I am Not Your FAN!!!! -- [Mommy Dearest]
• But You ARE Blanche, You ARE -- [Whatever Happened to Baby Jane]
• Fasten Your Seatbelts, It's Going to be a Bumpy Night -- [All About Eve]
• I always Depend on the Kindness of Strangers -- [Streetcar Named Desire]
• Hello Gorgeous -- [Funny Girl]

What We Call Each Other

Husbear Huscub Husband Boyfriend Lover Companion (Domestic) Partner

Significant Other (S.O.)  Other Half Mate Amante

On a Serious Note:   Words and phrases I don't use as a gay man include "the family tree stops here" or the
word "breeder".   Whoever said that wasn't aware of the fact that gay people can parent!! 
I also dislike the term "chaser" since it implies that the chasee is nothing but meat.